Monday, May 14, 2012

AIDS is women’s fault for being too attractive and moist. So force them by law to have their heads shaved

Zimbabwe senator Morgan Femai knows how to solve the AIDS problem in his country.

Senator Morgan Femai reportedly told a conference he believed the killer disease had spread because men found it difficult to resist attractive and well-dressed women.

In other words, AIDS is all women’s fault for being so adorable.  Men can’t possibly be expected to keep it in their pants or –heaven (literally) forbid – practice safe sex.  The solution is obvious to Femai: naturally he called for laws that force women to shave their heads and bathe less to be less attractive to men.

He also decided that the female body contains more moisture than the male, which causes bacteria to grow. He seemed confident that this had something to do with AIDS.  He called for more research on the subject:

There should be a way to suck out that moisture.

He said.

Needless to say, Zimbabwe has a large Catholic population, with its priests undermining any and all efforts at educating the people not to die.

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